[// AUTOLOGGING ERROR :( //) [autolog cannot access this file!] [if this file is in the "do not touch" list, then you are free to ignore this error.] MEMO7 - the-distance-
this memo is for anybody who, like me, yearns to explain what cannot be explained. let it serve as documentation and a stern warning.
i've an insatiable drive to get a firm grasp on what exactly the jouse is and how it works, for no reasoning other than my own selfish ones. through my investigation, i've discovered that the heavy keys hold a fragment of the simplest form of its essence. in other words, the heavy keys are small chunks of the jouse's potential. it began when i awoke one morning to find the purplekey on my nightstand. i touched it and, without a word, i reached a greater understanding of the jouse. it communicates only when it must, and will do so through raw thoughts conveyed through various means. the purplekey just happened to be an extreme example, since i've begun to pick up on little notes and messages left around the variants in both floor naming and design choices. though it can only speak in such a cryptic manner, the jouse understands our methods of expression just fine. in addition, it seems to be almost omnipresent within itself. despite that, the jouse has glaring blind spots. most notably, it can only see through what it has created. if somebody else were to hold its power to create, it would not be able to know how or where without outside interference. i've come to realize this when the jouse presented me with my very own redkey. limitless potential, just for me. it had trusted me, for whatever reason. i have done nothing but suspect and overanalyze, grasping at straws for any semblance of malicious intent. yet, despite all my searching, i found none. truly, i misunderstood the jouse on a fundamental level. it was a being of symbiotic nature. it created what its owner and guests would enjoy by prodding around the mind as you wandered. food for thought, to the most literal degree. the jouse must create to survive. though, at times, it had a difficult time discerning what was a "false" thought (intrusive and not reflective of the person) and a "true" thought. (a subconscious wanting and a mirror of the person's identity) you've surely seen it before, abandoned is but one example. i suspect it was birthed from my own deepest insecurities eating away at me following a bitter conversation with one i know well.
let my warning begin here. as i opened the first room, i heard walls shift that weren't of my own creation. this may be an effect i didn't think of, but i'm certain this would not be the case. i wouldn't be able to go back and check it, anyway. i'm in too deep. i can feel it, i'm getting close to the bottom. i must press on. for all it knows, i have completely vanished. and for all i know, there is no way out. i've become trapped inside my own walls.
for you: the next room i open will be the point of no return. i'm getting to the heart. your last chance to turn back is behind this wall, through the radio or flower pot. if you choose to proceeed, don't predict the rest to be as coherent as the previous rooms. stay focused and press on. ...and for kim: i'm sorry that was our last exchange. don't blame yourself for my shitty mood. i miss you.